You’re engaged, now what? After the proposal and you’ve had a chance to catch your breath, how do you even know where to start? As a wedding planner, I want to share 3 things to do after getting engaged.
Wedding planning can get overwhelming really quickly if you’re not careful. Every day on social media I see one burnt out bride after the next threatening to elope because it’s all just too much.
While, of course, I always recommend getting yourself an amazing full service wedding planner (cough cough like me cough cough) there are three other steps you should do first.
After the celebration is done and you’ve had a chance to catch your breath, you might be wondering where on earth to even start in the wedding planning process.
First things first…establish a budget.
Do you need a full comprehensive budget? Nope! But you do need an idea of just how much the total spend will be along with knowing who will be covering those costs.
For instance, will you and your fiancé be footing the entire bill or will you have help from your parents? Just how much help will be given?
I know, I know, money conversations are like the least fun ever. But, if you don’t start the wedding planning journey by establishing what you will spend and who is contributing what, you’re going to have a very stressful time.
Talk with each other to get an idea of the overall budget. Do you know what everything costs? Definitely not. However, when you’re shopping for a house, you know what you can spend so think of it just like that.
If you feel your budget isn’t going to stretch, you’ll have to both decide if you are willing to take help from outside sources. Having others contribute to your wedding will also open the door to other opinions and potential guilt trips. As much as it’s unfair to let anyone else plan what is supposed to be your day, if you take their money, I guarantee you they will have at least a few opinions.
Once you have your overall budget established, it’s time to break down your priorities. Take half of your wedding budget and put that aside for your venue, food, and beverage…any more than that and you’ll become “venue poor” and could have a hard time getting vendors within your budget that you have left.
Prioritize what is important to you. Is it wedding flowers? Is it the music? Just because popular wedding websites tell you what percentage you should spend on what doesn’t mean you have to do that. I mean, if certain things are less important to you than others, then don’t spend as much on those things!
Having these numbers will be extremely helpful for you when approaching vendors.
The second thing to do after you just got engaged is to discuss what type of wedding you both want. Are you looking for something intimate and small or a huge blowout with 400 of your closest friends and family members?
It’s really important to get on this same page early on in the wedding planning process. The style of your wedding will determine which wedding venues you tour and which ones you don’t even bother with.
For instance, if you want a small 50-person guest count, you’ll have to only look at places that don’t have 150-175 person minimums. But, if you want hundreds of people to attend your wedding, you’ll need to tour venues that have the space to host properly.
Also important to consider is the location of your ceremony. If you’re planning to get married off-site in a church or religious house, then the wedding venue you select should be close by. You don’t want your guests to spend half of your wedding day traveling and I promise, you don’t want to do this either.
Related: 15 Things To Do After Getting Engaged
The reason you need to figure this out before you start venue tours, is because how awful would it be if you found the perfect wedding venue only to find out that there is no religious house anywhere nearby?
The wedding planning process is stressful enough so don’t sabotage yourself by not having this conversation with your partner first.
Once you know how big or small you want your wedding day, it’s time for the third thing you need to do: Start discussing the overall vibe. Do you like a modern aesthetic with clean, neutral colors, or do you want something a bit more unique with some charm to it?
There are so many wedding venues to choose from and gone are the days of having only wedding halls and basic ballrooms to look at. Now, you can choose an elevated ballroom with gorgeous chandeliers inside of an estate, or get married outside with a tented reception in a field somewhere…your options are truly endless so it’s important to be on the same page for what you want before you start searching….
…unless you know, you like getting overwhelmed.
Once you have established an overall budget, along with who is responsible for paying what, then start figuring out those important details like guest count and vibes.
These three things to do after you get engaged will give your a great start in the process. Plus, you won’t get venue fatigue from visiting places that really don’t align with what you want on the wedding day.
If you’re looking for a wedding planner, having all of this information for them at the beginning will be super appreciated. Don’t believe me? Go gather those details up and then fill out my contact form and I’ll show you how happy a planner will get.
Congratulations on your engagement!
